Living with Dementia in India
A simple and practical guide for families and Caregivers
Why a Book for India?
Dementia care cannot simply be transplanted from one country to another.
India has its own strengths.
Families remain closely involved in the lives of ageing parents. Many older people continue to live at home. Several generations may remain connected. Domestic helpers and live-in carers can play an important role. Neighbours, communities and religious traditions can provide support.
But these strengths bring challenges too.
Who cares for Mummy when the daughter works?
What happens when the son lives in Britain, America, Canada, Australia or the Gulf?
How do you teach a home helper who may have received no formal dementia training?
What happens when Papa repeatedly wants to leave the house?
How should the family manage land, jewellery, bank accounts and property?
When does helping become taking over?
And what happens when one daughter quietly carries almost the entire burden of care because everybody assumes:
“She will manage.”
These are Indian dementia questions.
They deserve practical Indian answers.
This Is Not a Textbook
I have deliberately tried to keep medical language to a minimum.
A family dealing with dementia at two o’clock in the morning does not need a lecture.
They need to know:
What do I do?
So, throughout this book we return to four simple steps:
STOP → LOOK → ASK WHY → RESPOND
Before correcting.
Before arguing.
Before restraining.
Before giving another medicine.
Before saying:
“Mummy is being difficult.”
Stop.
Look.
Ask why.
Then respond.
For the Family Carer
This book is for the husband caring for his wife.
The wife caring for her husband.
The daughter trying to manage her mother, children and job.
The son organising care from another country.
The daughter-in-law who unexpectedly becomes the main carer.
The grandchild who wants to understand what is happening.
And the home helper who may never have heard the word dementia before but is nevertheless expected to provide much of the daily care.
It is also for the person with dementia.
Because throughout all the discussions about behaviour, safety, medicines, money and care, one principle must never disappear:
THE PERSON WITH DEMENTIA IS STILL A PERSON.
Dementia changes memory.
It changes abilities.
It changes relationships.
But it does not remove the person’s right to:
dignity, kindness, comfort, choice and respect.
That is why I wrote this book.
Bakul Kumar
September 2026
